I’m not proud of my sins. In fact, I’m ashamed of many things that I’ve done. But I’m not going to pretend that they didn’t happen. I have a life that I lived before I began to practice Islam, and many of my biggest sins were what led me to realize that I needed Allah SWT in the first place. I’m very open about the stupid things that I’ve done because the biggest thing that held me back from practicing Islam was the mentality that I’d already sinned so much that it was too late - that I was already gone and that there was no saving me. I want to make people realize that anyone can practice Islam, that anyone can change their life, that no matter how much you’ve sinned and no matter how far you’ve fallen that you can get back up and that Allah SWT will STILL be there for you. I’m not proud of them, but all of the sins that I committed led me to become who I am today and serve as a constant reminder of why I strive to be a better Muslim every single day.

One time in my language class, I was talking to my friends about how I had this professor who was a white Republican male who would stand in front of a classroom full of PoCs and complain about how unfair his life is and how much discrimination he has to go through for being a Republican in Seattle and this white girl chimed in to tell me that I was being racist and discriminatory and that not all white people are like that.  This is the same girl who told me I shouldn’t wear a headscarf and was all “proud of me” when I removed it (she knew nothing about my situation or why I removed it btw). So we kind of started to argue in front of the whole class but my friend stopped us before it got out of hand. After that, I never talked to her again, but the other day in class we had to partner up for oral quizzes and she was like “but I have no partner” and everyone just kind of pretended they didn’t hear a thing. 

Btw, 90% of my class is white.

I almost laughed out loud tbh.